Week 23.30 Control What You Control

This week I've been thinking about my friend and exceptional executive coach, Prakash Raman. I met Prakash during the early years of 100 Coaches, during which time he and I spoke at length about his coaching philosophy born from his years as a top-ranked tennis player. To improve on the court, the key, according to Prakash, was to focus on what you can control, improve that and then move on to another area. I thought of this as my dear friends searched for their first New York apartment this week. Out of the gate, they had a list of everything they wanted: light, space, location, washer/dryer, and, of course, price. The perfect apartments were always gone before they could schedule a viewing. The ones they saw were always flawed. There was so much they could not control that it was demoralizing. Then they took a step back, decided what they could control, and started addressing the problem. Their experience provided an excellent leadership lesson in controlling what we can control. 

Time. We often approach a problem in a hurry to find a solution. And sometimes there is a good reason to hurry: deadlines, cost of delays, needing a place to live. Of course, there is always a price as well. Sometimes we rush a decision; other times, we take too long and lose options. Other times, we do not even have control over our time. While determining how to handle a particular problem, we can take Prakash's advice and consider, if we have the option to control, what is the relative value of moving swiftly versus taking longer? Do we have more options if we wait, or does waiting limit our possibilities (e.g. deciding when to apply the brakes!) But time is only one variable to consider.

Talent. Another consideration we have as we approach the problem is whether we have the talent to make and execute the decision/action we are confronted by. It could be our ability to gather all the information to make a decision or the experience to take action. What resources do we have in our team? If we lack the resources, can we obtain them, or perhaps we can develop them? Again, Prakash's advice rings true - assess the situation and how important talent is in creating a successful outcome. And then, depending on your assessment, understand what you can control and make that happen. Of course, there is often one more factor to consider.

Treasure. So often, our trio is only complete once we factor in the cost of solving our problem. Sometimes the price is the time spent or it may be other resources. If we want more time, we may need to buy it. More talent comes at a price. As we begin to understand what we can control in time and talent, we also understand the cost of each decision. And then, we look at the total picture and can determine what is the right mix for this particular situation and what we can afford and cannot afford. But most of all, we have a more complete understanding of our options when we understand what we can control. 

My intrepid apartment-seeking friends quickly assessed their options and what they could control. They decided what they could give up and what they couldn’t live without. They prioritized the value of their time and the cost of an elongated search, so they eased their price constraints to give themselves more options. They felt the location was imperative, so they kept a limited scope. At the end of the search, it came down to views and light versus laundry... and the views won. In both life and leadership often find ourselves in seemingly complex situations with many variables. It can be hard to know where to begin. As Prakash would counsel, start by understanding which ones you can control, set your priorities, then address the problem. His advice is calming and elegant. By focusing on the most important thing, you can control what you control and achieve your best outcome. 

Why Learning to Fail Well Can Help Us To Thrive by Amy Edmondson

In her new book, “The Right Kind of Wrong: The Science of Failing Well,” Amy Edmondson aims to demystify failure. It addresses the two camps of thought on failure: the belief that failure is not an option and everything must go well, and the idea of failing fast and often. She argues that both camps have partial truths and context matters. The book introduces three types of failure: intelligent failures, basic failures, and complex failures. Intelligent failures are desirable as they involve learning and innovation, while basic and complex failures should be prevented whenever possible. Throughout the book, she provides numerous stories, examples, and best practices for navigating failure and cultivating self-awareness, situational awareness, and system awareness as crucial competencies.

When Your Employee Isn’t Reaching Their Full Potential by Tomas Chamorro-Premuzic and Dorie Clark

It can be frustrating to feel that your employees aren’t taking the initiative to do more with their talents. As their manager, you may even wonder if it’s a question of knowledge or willpower: Do they not understand what’s necessary to perform at their best? Or are they just unmotivated? In this article, the authors examine three main reasons why your employee may not be reaching their full potential: personal challenges, interpersonal issues, and leadership problems. It’s unpleasant to consider, but remember that at least 30% of employees’ performance is the product of how they’re managed, meaning that your leadership could play a big role in determining whether people are reaching their potential or not. It’s possible that, despite intending to support and nurture your employee, you may be squelching their talents through micromanagement, overly loose supervision, or poorly communicated objectives, among other managerial sins. The good news about this potentially alarming revelation is that it’s one area that’s firmly within your control. Understanding the gaps in your employees’ performance — and, perhaps, your own — is an exercise in thoughtfulness and empathy. By examining the possibilities above, you’ll be in a much better position to help guide your team to be at their best more frequently.

Science-Based Habits for Modern Leadership a new LinkedIn course by Caroline Webb

Great leadership ultimately depends on a leader’s interpersonal behavior and mindset. Do you have the mental and emotional skills to handle complexity and stress? Can you inspire and motivate your team to perform at a high level, even under pressure?

In this course, learn about practical, science-based habits to lead with wisdom, empathy, inspiration, and resilience, with tips from instructor Caroline Webb, a widely recognized global authority on the application of behavioral science in the workplace. By the end of this course, you'll be prepared to start applying new techniques and become the kind of leader everyone wants to work for.

With love, gratitude and wonder. Scott